I Never Liked Ketchup

Hi. It’s been awhile.

And there’s a few reasons for this.

The first is that I kept telling myself I couldn’t write if I didn’t have anything to say. The second was that I was feeling pretty worthless because I am still unemployed.

But before I get into all of my feelings and junk I thought I’d catch everyone up on everything.

Last time I wrote, Billy and I were arriving back to New York City from our Summer of Fun. Time is a funny thing. Here’s a quote from John Steinbeck, because he says everything better than anyone.

“Time interval is a strange and contradictory matter in the mind. It would be reasonable to suppose that a routine time or an eventless time would seem interminable. It should be so, but it is not. It is the dull eventless times that have no duration whatever. A time splashed with interest, wounded with tragedy, crevassed with joy – that’s the time that seems long in the memory. And this is right when you think about it. Eventlessness has no posts to drape duration on. From nothing to nothing is no time at all.”

-John Steinbeck, East of Eden

So I will tell of the posts of events that have happened to me since September. Because the rest of the time was no time at all.

After we arrived in NYC, we made our way to Robert and Camilla’s where we got to stay with them for a few weeks until they were able to pack up for their mission and head out. I teared up as I watched them drive down their driveway. I can’t believe how generous they are to allow us to live in their house for a year.

I applied to jobs for several weeks and Billy stayed very busy with school, rehearsals, and gigs.

This is what my life looked like.

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I went on a solo hike as fall came. I wanted it to be meditative and wholesome and reflective. It was sometimes. But mostly I was startled at every little rustle of leaf and twittering squirrel, thinking I was going to be attacked by a bear or a killer.

Either way it was beautiful.

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Next awesome event is that Billy bought a scooter to get from Grand Central to Juilliard. It saves us $121 a month on Subway passes.

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And he looks devilishly handsome riding it. How did I get so lucky?

We were very excited for Billy’s parents to come into town! They just got back from two years in Brazil. We mostly talked and let them recuperate in Robert and Camilla’s restorative home, but one day we planned to go to the city.

It has been Bill’s dream for a long time to see the Empire State Building. And we were so lucky to be with him while he fulfilled it! We were also very excited because we’d been wanting to do this for some time now, but never got around to it.

First we stopped at Zucker’s for some of the best bagels ever. And then we slowly made our way through the busy city.

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Billy and I had been in this lobby before. I was ecstatic to be able to go further this time!

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One quick elevator ride later and suddenly we were on the first level of the observatory. This floor had windows.

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The next observatory did not.

It was pretty cold up there.

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When our fingers were frozen and we were content that we’d gotten our share of the view we left to head to lunch.

Cheers to the kid who joined our family for this photograph.

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For lunch we tried to go to Jacob’s Pickles. We like to take everyone here because it’s our favorite.

Unfortunately they were suuuuper busy. So we walked a block and went to Maison’s Pickles instead. (Created by the same people. We like and have been to both.)

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After eating our perfect French toast and chicken (we both split the meal with our spouses) we dashed off to Lincoln Center to see Juilliard.

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We dropped Billy off for a four hour rehearsal and took an Uber to Grand Central where we caught a train home.

It was a great day!

And it was an even better week having them there. We were sad to hug them goodbye at the airport, but we are glad they’re back home in the States!

Another big event was my birthday!! Billy and I headed to the city to hang out with our friends Corinne and Preston. We first had delicious burgers that they treated us to. I hope my face tells you how happy I was.

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We went on a quick walk, and then Billy had a rehearsal to jet to. After we dropped him off at the subway we went on a beautiful walk through the park and had a spitting contest to see who could hit the cars going through the underpass we were on. They crowned me as honorary champion for my birthday, but Corinne was the real queen. True talent.

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And then we played games and watched movies until Billy could join us for dinner and more games.

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They sure know how to make  a girl feel special!

And here’s a bonus picture of the subway tunnel near their apartment because when it’s not gross it’s my favorite.

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The next event post was when Corinne and Preston came to our house a few weeks before and then again for Thanksgiving break. It was so great to have them here! We played so many games, they introduced me to my new favorite movie (go watch Hunt for the Wilderpeople!), skipped many rocks, ate so much food, and went on magical chilly walks to look at stars.

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Obviously I’m not a practiced rock skipper.

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Thanksgiving dinner was a feast of splendor! Billy worked hard on the turkey, dry brining it days in advance.  I made the gravy, and dirty rice (my grandma’s recipe). Corinne and Preston made the stuffing and mashed potatoes.  And Preston made the cheese cake which exempted him from making anything else. The roll dough was made the day before, and they turned out perfect.

We had a great time decorating the table with all of Camilla’s cute dishes and platters. We also had a Norman Rockwell-esque photo shoot

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And lastly–

We went hunting for our perfect Christmas tree.

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And that’s it! That’s my life from September to now.

During all my free time I’ve done a lot of rejoicing in my unrestricted schedule, doing yoga and reading books and taking naps whenever I want. I’ve done a lot of self-loathing while wallowing on the couch, trying to rationalize why I can’t find a job and what’s wrong with me. I’ve done a lot of soul searching, looking for what I truly want and how to attain those things. There’s a lot of time in my days for all of the above. I like to keep busy.

Basically I’ve come to this conclusion. Yes I’m 23 now. I’m not currently where I want to be, but I am where I need to be. I will eventually get to where I’m going. And it is perfectly okay for me to be a little lost right now.

I have a great opportunity to pick up the pieces that I want moving forward.

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